Lovemaking is an integral part of any intimate relationship including marriage. Couples tend to frequently indulge in intimate love-making during the initial phase of their relationship. However, with time, their desires gradually experience a downfall. Often women are heard complaining about a lack of interest in intercourse and come up with excuses like not being in the mood. Men can also experience a loss of libido. They may become mechanical in the entire process of lovemaking by completely foregoing pre-lovemaking fun, with their focus being on achieving the big O as quickly as they can and then catch up on some sleep.
While the loss of libido can wreak havoc in a relationship, the situation gets magnified twice as much where only one partner seems to suffer from this condition. If this is a familiar scenario you can relate to, here is another shocking detail. According to a study conducted by La Trobe, The University of South Wales, and The University of Sydney – up to 55% women and 25% men in Australia suffered from a loss of libido or lack of interest in lovemaking. With the results showing more than 50% of women being affected compared to men, it’s understandable why relationships suffer from insecurities and infidelities.
So, what is it that causes couples to lose interest in lovemaking? Listed here are 7 such common causes:
This is a very common cause of distress among married couples, especially if they have entered wedlock through an arranged marriage, where both partners generally don’t get enough time to get to know each other well at a personal level. Once the honeymoon period subsides, the initial attraction fizzles out. This does not mean that they completely stop loving each other, but the fact remains that their incompatible nature does extinguish their passion to a larger extent, though couples do put in honest efforts to make their marriage work.
There is no denying that despite having a youthful outlook towards life, people do age physiologically. A woman’s body which has been through the rigors of motherhood, regular housework routines, and hormonal upheavals, leaves her with health-related issues, especially low levels of estrogen that cause vaginal dryness; reason enough for women to avoid intimacy. Men too suffer from falling levels of testosterone that have an adverse effect on their love life.
3. Stress And/Or Depression
Our daily lives are replete with all sorts of lifestyle stressors. You may experience stress at work, family problems, financial issues, or emotional stress, all of which will considerably lower your intimacy drive. However, if you have been feeling emotionally low for more than two months, it is prudent to check with a doctor to ensure you do not suffer from depression. In which case, do not delay in getting a proper treatment.
4. Absence Of Grooming
Let’s admit it, as much as we would hate to, that physical intimacy being all about, well, your body, a well-groomed physical appearance does play a key role. Not that it’s necessary to set unrealistic expectations like a size zero for women or a six-pack ab for men. But who wouldn’t get turned on with an awesome smelling aftershave or a lacy itsy-bitsy lingerie!
5. A Pill That Kills
And by that, we mean killing your lovemaking drive. If you suffer from depression or other mental health conditions, chances are those anti-depressants may be silently smothering your love life as a side effect. Even seemingly harmless medicines like anti-histamines for allergies, birth control pills or painkillers that contain medical marijuana can have a similar side effect.
6. Unhygienic Habits
Just like how a well-groomed personality appeals to your partner, being unhygienic has a totally opposite effect. Every time you’ve slathered your sandwich with that extra garlic mayonnaise or were lazy enough to avoid a shower for three days before a romp, you end up pushing away your partner by miles!
7. Being Inconsiderate
You may not be up to it, but is it fair to deny your husband his share of fun? You may possibly achieve the big O in no time, but does that mean you’ll not indulge your wife in some pre-lovemaking massage to help her achieve hers? Being inconsiderate to each other not only drifts you apart physically but may distance you emotionally too.
Having a low intimacy drive is a passing phase with different stressors as contributing factors. However, if you take care to address these common causes by making honest attempts to groom well, be hygienic and considerate, and above all, taking good care of your health, we are sure that your love life will be back on track in no time.